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Thursday, November 30, 2006
iKea?! Sixtec?! Badminaton?! finding all sorts of activites to chill ourselves after many big loads are unloaded... perhaps for the time-being...
it had been ages for an outing for my poly coursemate... haiz...
this morning, got to know from my friend that she has a great group member and an excellent group leader... being having a guy that i know is so despicable, i will not tolerate to screw tt person down... besides, i and him had an "undesirable" history... luckily i was never blind! but at the moment of time, i was at utmost furious... called himself a man... i wanted to tell him off from head to toe... hope i wish to give him a tight slap... if he don receive such reprimand, he will never know what mistakes he had done...
all men in this world are the same... men talks?! c'mon... all they know is about their life... who cares! why shall they be bothered... and females are always there, silently supressing such sufferrings... NO... female's tears are much more precious... god bestows such ability because females are supposed to be the slave of men... it is the only way to release their sadness in order to enjoy the upcoming happiness... why shall females oblige such fate...
anywhere, life is never ending... a story ending is another story beginning...
i realised, in my house, there is a SHP... attitude quite similar on work... does not like to use her brain... stubborn of her method yet wants people to help... never be responsilbe for the wrong-doing... as so well... who asked i'm born in that family to serve them... just keep my mouth shut and do what i'm told to do... don be too clever ya!
haiz... had a fun day working... saudi arabian's customers are coming next week... oh... they were told to be a very very demanding type of people... customer is the kind, others are slave... haiz... stress moments for my colleagues... so sad... i can't help much... jia you oh...
hopefully, i can get to meet kyeo and kwoo tomolo... kyeo, a loveable friend that i have... haha... kwoo, a pathetic friend that i have... haha... but both are the 2 most important roles in my life... haha-haha... hope that i have a smooth day tomolo... yes, i must have... extras and spoilers, pls shoo!
today is the commemorative day for my deceased grandpa... it's been 2 years... missed him a lot! i'm such an unfilial grand-daughter... i has never had the opportunity to commemorate the lost of him... goodness! last year, i'm in shanghai... this year, i'm schooling and working... the sin has always in my heart for not able to send him off... i only have the memory and photo to recollect everything about him...
Bye Novemember 2006... it is left with 31 days before the year comes to an end... haiz... touchy year...
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 11:23 PM
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Wednesday, November 29, 2006
ya baby... a lot was taken off... but left one more still hanging dangling there - mp report and crm assignment(wip)... more to come... crm project and supply chain project plus case study... oh... no sweat....
today's mp judging was badly done... i could blame no one because i shall reflect on myself why i didn't correct her from the start... focusing on wrong direction, replying wrong answer... why can i blame her... what can i do then... i learnt one thing... she is the leader, i should obey my leader... since she wants to seal what i have done, den let it be... i hate exaggrate publicity... the most fulfilment in work is oneself... if i felt that i had done my best shot, it is there, you can hide for today, but you cannot hide forever against your conscience... as a slave or as an idoit, i know what's the conduct for my result...
an excellent product does not need bucks for publicity to get recognise... it is recognised!
congra to those who presented well for today's mp judging... from my mp sup, he commented on a group which has a lot of pie chart and statistic... great job guys! but what's important in presenting...
it is important to meet the psycology needs in the judge's mind to score well instead of bragging and exaggerating the quantity of what you have done...
after my presentation, i was hanging around the floor... doubtless what shall i do to spend my time till 5pm... and... etched in my record book - i spoke to LFS... haha... i commented why they are so "gan-chiong" when i noticed his group sitting outside the lab... haha... perhaps, they are not "gan-chiong"... the lab was actually quite noisy... haha... c'mon... i'm a very friendly person...
haiz... i think i should go a make-over session... in and out!
pacing up and down of TM and CS... looking for the perfect Get Well Soon card for Mr James and hopefully buy a watch for Lin Yan... hmm... no money... loLx... go and withdraw money and caught by the survery personell... haha... idoit him! say money as rubbish... why shall i save them in the bank instead of investing for higher profits... the... get this sicko out of the service line man... so pathetic... like sim chuan no. 2...
well... can't get the watch for Lin Yan... she treated me Din Tai Feng... I'm not a miser okay... saw her hand so lonely attached with one or two of her watches... haiz... wanna find something to... hmm... ya... haiz...
well, meet the editor for engrg sch magazine... haha... pathetic... brought me back to the memory of how i have to post and force that pathetic smell of mine for photo-taking... haiz... but tt guy still not tt bad lar... comment that my fingers are long... haha... and nice... haha... my hand is valuable... haha... next time can go ads liao... haha... but feel like giving my hope of photographing when an pisser got praised that she might become a photographer when she had so much to talk... don she knows, her taste r tt bad... it is easy to say than act...
cut the craps... i'm off to work... haiz... tomolo working... others may think why am i so siao that i have to work every week... well, i just trying to utilize my time... it is rather a free-and-easy semester that i got... cutting down those lackadaisical time and motivate for life, tt's the only solution... don worry about me... i know no one will... loLx...
happy birthday to Angline Chua... cheer up baby... quit smoking and tatooting... u r a babe if someone will take a second look at you... (sorry, i'm not close to her at all...)
welcome jerry to singapore...
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 9:46 PM
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Tuesday, November 28, 2006
received a letter from the police... oh... what have i done...?!
I once have a dream which is to be a righteous and equity police officer... putting all the wrong-diong people behind the bar... but what i realised, my sentiment overweights evidence sometimes...
besides tt, the passion being a police is always present even i denied it... when my rc has an event where they invites those police officers for a talk or an showcase... oh... i fall in love with a policeman... oh... he is amazing charming... haha... can you hear my heart beat sound... haha... it sounded like a little girl drooling at the shoulder of the policeman who carried her on his arm... oh... but tt never happened to me... too bad! i only got an occurrence where my charming policeman looked for me to pass me a alert whistle... -_-''... oh... i think i had screwed up the whole scene...
i began to know another factor of myself...
If I deemed that I'm correct, no one has the rights to correct me unless I am defeated by defending myself... don't wish to mention some !#$%^ person...
a year... sounded not too short nor not too long... but i am able to bare for this year is a blessing in disguise... all the angerness and tearing, who the hell on earth could understand... precisely, i don admit i'm a human... because a human can't tolerate tt long... i often describe myself as an innocent passerby who was jailed for lifetime imprisonment... everyone said, bare a few months more and you will get release... well... a few months more... it seemed few decades more to me... the biggest fear is not fear... the biggest fear is when you realised yourself being in phobia and depression passing everyday... expect me to see a culprit unapprehended freely on the streets... NO... i'm gonna let those deserved ones pay for their price...
i'm going to use this explaination to those who advised me to bare for a few months more... first person - Lin Yan... who is the culprit now... (oh, teri... no need to extract and print for tt ah-ma... loLx)
enough... hey wendy, i saw the napfa tester just now... forgot to bash him up... he looked so blur... haha... tt one lor... tt tanned, not very tall, shutter run station testor... not the pathetic "acted-cool" one... haha...
haiz... feel like restarting the whole world... perhaps, i had did once before because everything seemed to unrealistic and familiar to me...
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 7:12 PM
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Monday, November 27, 2006
the 6th week of school... and the busy and big-head week of the semester... haiz...
tell you something... i'm not the only one who injured my stomach muscle... haha... wendy and huifen feel the same "ouch" as i do... haha... we can't laugh out loud or cough... loLx... haha...
reached school, got ferrero rocher to eat... thanks bel's mum... so sweet of her... but rather, the box of ferrero rocher was quite bais only to our class... well... on behalf on those who send regards to bel but did not receive the ferrero rocher - Thank You...
a rare day for me to be feeling a bit good whilst pissing off with my stuff... haha... all thanks to the cooling weather... haha...
got to stop here... can't missed the nice sleep offered from "upstairs"...
is there rainbow tomolo?!
------ cherish =)
darlin left a note at 11:17 PM
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Sunday, November 26, 2006
congra on my 100th post in blogger...
god... i just beg for an extra day off from my upcoming stress and tangled 6th week of school... gosh! give me a break...
barely for both eyes to use at the same times in this hour... reports, assignments... i just don understand what do all these gonna to do with my future... it is such a waste of time and effort... and pathietically to mention, mentally and emtionally distortion...
aching is still all over my body... blame me for not doing enough stretching... c'mon... i'm totally defeated by fitness thingy...
i teased my cousin today... she weeps to the heaven and hell when another cousin of mine, foiled the plan about my cousin's birthday present... haiz... i rejected to bring out the present to her... when the adult was not as stubborn as me, she finally drilled down... when i peeped a smirk on her face, i told her "now you happy rite"... and... i became the murderer... the engine had broke down... well... she is still a kid... haiz... sorry lor... and in life, there's always a "rat's shit"... haha... defined tt in chinese...
oh... i can't wait to go to china... a place for me to harbour my supresses down... but, a calm wave always followed by a thunderstorm... eps coming after december term break... to others, maybe nothing... to me, a battle against the inner and conscience of myself...
do you know what is retribution... a relative of mine mocked at me because i'm a 5 years student... "it is such a disgracing... you will feel very remorseful..." haha... i'm proudly to say... that's my destiny... that's my choice... that's my pride and honor because I don't see i'm inferior than those 4 years... it is not 4 yrs or 5 yrs of education that judged one's life...
"it is the wisdom and determination that writes one's successful future..."and may i have this honor to announce, their little son is following my steps... serve them right... this teaches everyone a lesson... have you learn?!
questioned me, the reasons of being...
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 11:35 PM
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Saturday, November 25, 2006
had a happy outing with my parent when an idoit interrupting my day... pissed off... argh...
i can't sneeze or cough... i'm injured my stomach muscle... ouch!
you know what... suddenly, i have an urge to have a bf... but, being bachelorette is something that i won't forfide... it just that, i feel like to have a bf to play... haha... loLx... guys are going to murder me... haha...
i had good news... i'm going to end today's blog here... stress ah...
here got something to share with all of you...
(omg... i won't dream to eat these...)
(can you see an adult and a child praying... impressive bah...)
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 10:23 PM
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Friday, November 24, 2006
a night after napfa test... well... i'm proud to say that i'd... failed in 2 stations... sit & reach and 2.4km... tt means, i failed the whole napfa... haiz... seriously damaged my body... aching everywhere... and i so stupid, didn't wear sport shoe to sch... where tt converse flat shoe... now got blisters... loLx... but don mention ethnically... i cheated by adding 5 more sit ups... haha... watever... a child from a poor stamina family is like that...
but... i'm only happy with my shuttle run... can't believable... i ran a timing of 11.6 secs... loLx... but don know why... sitting at the stadium, waiting for the rain to abate... i have an urge to have my brother by my side... oh... the days without him, i had been peevishing all my way... hemm here hemm there... haiz... like a missy... haiz... missing him... and i know he wont miss him even i begged him... haiz... men are jerks...
in addition that i wan to say, the testers are quite good-looking (one eg is tt shortie and the pull-up tester... haha...) but tt were minority... haha... sports athlete mah... haiz... think too much...
anywhere, have some great time slacking in the lab before attending the napfa test... lack of the spur to focus on projects... the weather was just too great to sleep... fidgeting with the internet, chatting... den, my china sup chatted with me.... in english... haiz... whenever i'm in school, she will chat with me... whenever i'm at home, she can't even bother with me... anywhere, hope she is well... baby is delievering to this world at around april... so happy... i'm going to be an "oversea auntie" lor....
then, someone added me in msn... first come to my mind... hmm... i think is her... the child from "cutecute.com" or i think "fatfat.com" family... haha... tt's kid's language... haha... btw, she was my cousin... hmm... going to sec 1 next year... scored quite well... troubling with what school hopefully to be posted into... however, some facts she doesn't believe that i'm a NA student with aggregate of 184... loLx... so wat with 184 score... met a gang of trustful friends... grew up (mature) together... then knowing the consequences of being "too-friendly"... but pathetically to say, one advantage is, i no need to trouble so much of entering to which school... haha...
perhaps with her aggregate of 235, hopefully she can enters temasek sec (her choice) or st' anthony or pasir ris crest... i'm a bit bias in pushing her for my ex-sec sch... well... hasn't been improving... it just happened to let me see too much "negatives" about the school... but still can consider lar... so i can pass my un-used exercise books to the next generation... haha... loLx...
watever it is, you will meet plenty of challenges in the future... most importantly, you must know how to overcome those obstacles... and by that, prepare yourself for the sloping-up stages towards your future... a good school doesn't mean anything... the aiming for good school is the ablilty to develop your personal character and allows you to enhance the capability that's within you... even you will have to make many sacrifices, make sure you don't regret on one fine day... withstand your will, challenge yourself and prove to everyone you can succeed... one important recommendation for you is, from the first day of your sec sch life, note your surroundings, especially your classmates, down in somewhere... because when you graduate, you will reach that generation of reminiscing the first day we met... haha... how nerd we are... what is our first conversation...
you know why suddenly i became a professor... because my cousin might be reading my blog... gracious me... during my days, i don even know how to define "technology"... everything happened with a reason... everyone's needs and wants are unappeasable...
well, i have to make a sincere apology... setting a bad example of a group mate... i can't convince myself that i'm doing a great project... there were too many loops to amend and improve... i was helpless... we are considered as a group... but it is difficult to work as an individual because we have to pace fast in meeting surging different targets depending on one's ability... i failed to be a good group mate... i disappointed my mp supervisor... BUT, i will never forgive mself... you can say me attitude problem... but, those "incapability", "disrespect", "miscommunication", "selfishness", "irrespondsive"... perhaps some others more... these were the things that bind us APART... but if i will to make a last wish, i hope that the world who hates her can be her friends for a day... just to let her know that, she is such a detester...
last but not least, i'm dead beat... haha... lastly, i have a word to say to these 2 persons - feng sheng and chun leng... i'm sorry... i don noe both of you were saying 'hi' to me when we rubbed our shoulders at the concourse level... i'm sorry... i ignored both of you because i'm shy... loLx... haiz... haiz... but this napfa test, i have a deep feelings... which is... such a rare opportunity to bring us together... we had been coursemates for almost 3 years, but we never had the opportunity to know another dimensions of each other besides our 1st year orientation... we never had the "occurrence" that sparked our first conversation... haiz... today i said "hi" to hazel on the bus... you see... then i won't be so dumbfounded about myself today... god...
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 11:36 PM
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Thursday, November 23, 2006
fried prawn noodle, chwee kuei, steamed fish head, lime juice... tt's my dinner... haha... finally have a sumptuous dinner at chinatown temp food center near SGH... haha...
it was a nice outing... though very tired... haiz...
wat the heck... tomolo is the NAPFA test... haiz... read the email so many times... the word "compulsary" seemed to be invisible in my eyes... haiz.... how to handle thousand of things using 2 hand... haiz..... without me, my MP is corrupted... such a big problem until i got to know after months... haiz... forget to write in my MP survey... NEVER seperate MP and SIP again... so terrible... hopeless school ah...
ya... received the statement for payment of school fee... $1,050... last sem, didn't learn anything... just play computer from 9am to 5:30pm... we pay for the usage of using the computers... wat the heck... even the bill is not tt high lor... haiz... somemore, we pay to torture ourselves... stupid rite... don tell other people hor...
Haven graduate, think of looking for society college liao... haiz...
GIC -
BUSINESS ASSISTANT You will be an integral part of the business management team in the Equities Department, responsible for handling administration processes and systems of the department. The scope of work is varied and there is significant room for personal development.
Your main responsibilities will include:
· Assisting the Senior Business Officer in coordinating and collating manpower, recruitment, staff training and information services requests and rendering support to the formulation of the department’s yearly budget and track expenses incurred
· Liaising with the administration and personnel department to coordinate delivery and payment of information services and other staff-related matters
· Performing system administration of the department’s front office and analytics systems
· Being a member of the department’s business continuity team
· Assisting the department’s Governance Officer in the discharge of Compliance matters
You should possess a Diploma with at least one year of working experience. Good knowledge of MS Office (Excel and Access) is preferred. You should also be comfortable working with numbers.We are looking for a team player who is committed, detail-oriented and comfortable working in a dynamic and fast-paced investment environment. Just nice... hmm...
Though of pursuing further studies... (throw one stone in the street will hit a degree holder scholar) though of venturing... (my REDOTravel Agency... my PH... oh... ambitious...) though of joining Eurocopter as a member... (It's such a rare opportunity to work in a company that manufacture Helicopters... attractive salary is secondary... but the office policital is sore...)
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 11:26 PM
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Wednesday, November 22, 2006
i'm going to berserk if my life is going to carry on in such manner...
the insight of my life is in totaly mess... tt's wat could kill me... besides my room which i can't do anything... i don allow any disorganised orientation that i am working on... and tt's wat makes me feel like murdering someone when she screamed at me for wasting my time doing formatting... wtf... expect me to work in a rubbish... sorry, i'm not like you, bastard... looking you for living in such horrible site for 19 years... it's such a pity i shall say... and you don cry... the action of ruining your life, have not even reach a percent...
everyone is busy... so do i... but something that i swear not to be sorry is, never failed to remember one's birthday and etched the memory for him/her... because i can't swear that i can celebrate your birthday next year... life is unpredictable... even when i was exhausted today when i got home, i though i could not wake up... and you will see me in the news for the 5th case of "dead in sleep" within a month... tt's not a joke...
seeing many people in my life, aparting something called friendship... well, what can i say... holding that till the every last second, i will not give up... however, how i wish i'm leaving in a planet with only me and everything that i wan at tt point of time... where laughter and sadness have no restrictions and hindrance... call me anti-social...
anywhere, i have a sudden realization tt i'm the happiness person in this world... while handling my study and working, i don have a qualm of losing the most 2 important occupation in life... but the verge of losing the confidence and trust from colleagues, i deemed to be a failure... i felt so dready to live in such jumpy life... it is so hard... and i feel so tired of living...
i am beginning not to know who i am...
last but not least, happy 22th birthday to Lin Yan... i could feel the loneliness in her heart even though she put on a happy make-up everyday...
perhaps, i need some brotherly love... tt's the only "love" tt makes me believe of existing... parent's love... friend's love... lover's love... all are fairytales to fool the folks in this world... have you?!
------ cherish =(
darlin left a note at 9:34 PM
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Tuesday, November 21, 2006
fancy writing my blog in school... hmm... i don think tt's a good idea... cos a post of mine takes a long time... i did post my blog in school before... it was during my mp in-house period... c'mon... no restriction of your time to waste... overall, i still perfer to stay at my little corner and cleared my mind before i decided to create the episode of the day...
tomolo is wednesday lor... hmm...
a doctor passed away in his sleep... he is the 4th within a month... everyday, there will be 1 to 2 person died in their sleep... well... actually tt's not a scary figure... when times up, you have to desert everything and go... i wonder... will i... well... my heart... clueless... anywhere, do a ghost has a heart... hmm... tt's weird...
life had been so stressful... can't find a time, need not think of anything, peacefully live like a free bird... 3 more weeks... by tt time, my brother will be back... hopefully my only term test is over... set my mind and sailed towards the sky... zoom... but tt only last for a week... after coming back, another war... haiz... 3 months... after 3 months, i will resign... from polytechnic... where shall i go then?!
ever though of going overseas for study... but c'mon... local uni can't accept... go overseas sweep floor ah... but, i wil miss schooling days... schooling in insitutes, and not in society school for my rest of life... afterall, i will not have school holiday or term break any more... oh... tt's so bad... how can...
eileen and i had not been chatting for more than a week... today, while rushing for my project, suprising saw her blinking at my taskbar... perhaps, i'm too selfish... i could not let go of her because i'm too dependent of her... a pillar of my life - not to that extent... but for those lonely days, i think a lot... i'm gratitude to meet her in my life... those memories, i can keep with me forever... but as a human being, she does not belongs to the nether world... being apart with such a friend i have, it's my lose... but that does not mean that the others who i met were not my friends... everyone is my friend... but eileen is rather a special one... tt's all i can say... please do not be hurt or insulted by my words... you are not me... and no one will understand me...
oh... goong-princess hours had ended... salute to a great show for such unique nostalgic sentiment integarted with modern classicism... spendid! everyone is so sick of modern days, dull cast story... i believe if Huan Zhu Ge Ge returns, the tv viewers statistic will burst again...the psycology of human is - repeatedly need changes... but i just don understand, why shall enmity turns into love...
fancy calling myself busy, well... had been "saving" song... haha...
share the happines of this newly father...
okay... stop here...
------ cherish =)
darlin left a note at 10:36 PM
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Sunday, November 19, 2006
firstly, congra Zax and Qi Qin for being the first parent of their life... but it's a pity that someone does not abide by the rule... a reporter sneaked into the hospital to take photo of the mother... and as announced from Zax, if there shall be any incorrigible mass media personnel who does not give the family a road of freedom, Zax will not hold any press conference at the door of hospital... is that true?!
haha... baby, nick name, Le Le is born... both mother and daughter are safe and sound... a huge baby weight 3.4kg... wow! can see from zax's face - happiness and happiness and happines on the green operation suit and his baby girl foot print... haha... it's been tough for them... haiz... a miracle i should say... mother had risked her life to paunch this new life to the world... great job!
i would only like to say, blessed them forever happiness...
haha... sorry for listening to a bossy lady about their affair so much...
however, i don noe whether it is a bless or a " "... watever... alvin heng is celebrating his 19th birthday today also... well... i hope baby Le Le is really happier than this boy that i knew... ya... loLx... happy birthday to Alvin...
watching Zax recent post in his blog about media being over-limit in fighting for their bowl of rice... writing untrue story... stiff competition... i believed too after watching A1 Headnews from channel u... cool... though i don really understand the ending, i love many of the cast lines... "belief" only belongs to religious follower... mass media is looking for evidence and they will report whatever they see to the public... believe, only depends on readers...
ya... one side they are reporting, the other side, i'm reporting also... wat the shit... i was thrown with a mess of shit... i hate untidiness... if i'm the boss, i will SCREAM at you... i totally cannot stands on inorganised things and "quality" in number of pages... i don't care... with no basic need met, don talk to me... even you need the items by tomorrow, you jolly well have to wait for me to organise that junk of things up, closest to any perfection... well... i don't care... that's me! and tt's the fact... the easiest thing to get me pissed off... try on me and you will taste it... count yourself just too bad! i'm tt nasty kind of person...
it's confirmed... i'll be living singapore on 16th dec, morning flight, for a family excursion, first and last time... when i'm back, catch my story... haha...
alright... sucks... tomolo is monday... haiz..........
not to forget, it's a wonderful sunday that i had today... people fly towards me, i mean my laptop... transferring songs from my collection of 1,155 title... well... then used my computer to view photos, watch videos... haha...
share with everyone, a photo of me and my brother that were never to the public... by the texture of the photo, i bet you all can imagine how old they were...
do you know that, i'm the only person who holds the last photo of my late grandpa... photo taken 30/08/2003, 4:31pm... at the roof top of suntec city tower... taken by fujitec finepix f401, camera borrowed from kenneth woo...
if my computer was to attack my virus and got formatted one day, i only wish that this photo of my late grandpa (and my yet-to-completed story) are the only left over... i won't ask for anything else...
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 11:36 PM
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Saturday, November 18, 2006
today... nice day... woke up at 9am... do nothing until 10am den start working on project... hmm... 0/2 project was completed... hmm... impressive ah... but at least i did something okay...
watched 4:30pm japanese anime - Ai Yori Aoshi... about a yet-to-married couple, living together with some friends... Kaoru-san and Aoi-chan got to know each other since young and decided to get married with each other when grow up... both were from wealthy family but the fiance ran out from home at teens age... fiancee came out to look for him... the story is about compromising with each other life while one is studying studiously and the other faithfully staying at home doing houseworks like a traditional wife... somehow, felt touching at some scenes where aoi-chan is unconditionally staying behind her fiance side like a guardian angel... oh... how can you find such "stupid" women in this world... tt's a fairytale... haiz... can't imagine what will happen when they officially announced that they were actually couple to kaoru-san's gang of admirers living together... shocked to death... haha...
i'm less interested in the full metal alchemist... got so complicated... haiz... don noe when is it gonna finish...
anywhere, i enjoyed saturday very much... if everyday is fri and sat, tt's will be so great! but live doing something meaningfully and efficiently... not like today... haiz... don say liao lar... kanna tricked to go down to whampoa but the president and supervisor not present... haiz... although small association, politics culture is far too unsolveable... haiz... life is like that... if you can't adapt, you are disqualified from this game...
haiz... seldom have the chance to went town on sat... such a bad experience... surroundered by poeple of different residence of country, india, china, indonesia and singapore... pathetic... only one word - it sinks... china chap smelled of alcoholic in front of me, an indian lady smell and the hair kept brushing my arm standing behind me, an inconsiderate guy taking so much space swinging left to me and tt group of indonesian chaps talking non-stop... omg... can't imagine how singaporean manage to live "racial harmony" for such a long years... i doubted myself too... i think singaporean is not tt open and friendly... i think singaporean is... "cannot be bothered"... haiz...
my house seemed so emptied without my brother... haiz... but he made no difference also lar... perhaps he is the only person where i can crap and the only person who will not walked away from me when i speaks of truth... haiz...
gonna write the 2nd get well soon card soon... this month ah... why so ill-fated... haiz...
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 11:52 PM
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Friday, November 17, 2006
i just don feel morally right and ethicality fair and so guilt... i was elected for EPS (engineering project show)... not because i did a great project, not because i splendid proposal to a system neither because i'd made my team proud... i felt ashamed... it was like i had embezzled the public money or altered on the financial statement... i was elected for the rare opportunity to present in the EPS because i am working with a top student who is brainless... who are the others who had done well for their project... 3 group of us, i was totally flabbergasted... this is too much...
haiz... can't bring myself to work today... slept from 1:30 to 4:30pm... haha... trying to catch back my sleep and slacking to all i can... only for today lar... i have plenty of work waiting for me to do... supply chain project, customer relationship management lab, mp aka ccom report... simply say, i'm so tired... my heart has never been in ligh before... it felt so tight, so high as if on my shoulder... trying to catch my breathe more often recently... these political conflicts, i'd seen too much... why can't human live is a neutral state... ghost like me, pity human...
wondered how mr james is now... operation is over i supposed... but don ask me... as i surrendered, i'm always the last to know for what i shall see as the first few... i'm sorry...
princess hours has 2 more episodes before it ends... well... after watching the second time, i still can't understand why cai jing falls in love wih shin because she felt that he is lonely and shall be loved... when cai jing couldn't breathe because she can't felt the love from shin, both of them went into despair... is love just those usual lines and tt boring style... is love tt hard to pronounce... it is so melancholy... haiz... no wonder the song for the drama named "you and i were stupid"...
haiz... watched zax on 14-nov on wan quan yu le... he shed when he heard that jason commented that Ji Qin was so great... indeed! all because of him... so envious... omg... kept repeating "envious" for continuous of days... bo bian... i'm so envious...
well... i think during the last class gathering, i had did a big mistake... commenting on how truth costed me a friend and truth's truth costed me another friend... well, now, i'm unattached and unavailable... loner...
my quote: "don stay put in the history... must know have to fight and survive and create a tomorrow... you are the main lead of this show - life is like a stage... men and women were merely players..."
happy birthday to may fong - my superior while working in GIC...
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 11:23 PM
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Thursday, November 16, 2006
today, don noe why... feel relieved... maybe i finally got a day no need to see (probably the correct word is hide) her... no need to hear tt squicky noise of someone... haha... haiz... but the start of the day was quite low... can't bring myself up... the moment stepped out from the toliet, forced out a smile... even i'm sad, tired and moody, i must not affect anyone around me...
the day passed quite fast... apel tutor so pathetic... i think he is feeling quite desponate when his students were up to his words... haha... we are not 3 nor 13 years old kids... ask us to do what, we will do what... as long as u allow us to pass this subject, u happy we happy... teased you sometimes make ur hour passed less "nervous"... u c... i so good...
today don noe y... hoping to catch a glimspe of my little brother... trying to colour my day... but... he vanished like ghost... omg... a newcomer in the nether word?! he is on his green tee today... i'm sure... loLx...
watching Zax announcing he is going to be a father... seeing Zax apologised for setting a bad example as a public character... reading Zax's eyes for the happiness that he had sought in torment just to make his wife and future a better one... i saluated to him... such a hero... so suave... so envious... oh... enough of him... he made me have an urge of falling in love... haiz...
people, the "fruit" team is out... they cheat your money by saying ur family member is going to be dead... ask you to buy jewelleries and money to pray for a amulet or what shit lar... c'mon... wan to pray, come and pray me first lar... at least i can promise i will give u a slap to wake u up...
hmm... went to bel's house to do case study... unable to cheer her up as much as "expertises" can do so... well... her father curry was splendid... nonya ginger curry... oh... feel so paisai being so dote by her mother... well nto to forget, bel is touched by the get well soon card?! so-so lar...
goong - princess hours is gonna finish... oh... tt kiss... don missed it... it is so... yum yum... i mean passionate... oh... what can i say... can't wait to create such touching scene and lines in my dream... oh... oh... oh... i swear my love for you and forever...
FIGHTING!
my brother away for the 2nd day... haha... just now he pinged me in msn... haha... i acted as if i don noe him... haha... haiz... aparting seemed to be a part and parcel of life... but i missed him... short of the "missy lady" voice stealthily on the phone with someone... lost the sense of having an active soul behind my back... haiz... lonely... where are my god-brothers?! don think i treated u all good for nothing hor... u all r my treasure... the power to live and strengthing the challenge beyond the understanding of man's power...
i ever thought of pursuing overseas studies... when i got to know that require good knowledge and money... haiz... IQ high x=x to successful... EQ, VQ and AQ... loLx... i think go roving is much easier... taking photos using my hp (when i found a pro one) on every spot that i land... picturing my photos into story... it does not matter how good is your camera... it is how and what u wants ur photos to be... i wan to be a pro photographer using only hp camera phone... here i come... haha... tt's the reason why i love travelling and to become a pilot (or air-stewardess), serving those people filled of dreams and hope arriving at their destinations... a reunion or a new start or a new discovery... hoho... such a great aspiration!
projects are giving headache... manage to divide my brain to many segmentation... have timer and file allocation to sort my ideas... oh... it's killing me softly...
FIGHT! FIGHT!
was a little abruptness yesterday... my apologises... wow... didn't realised tt my blog had broke 300... hmm... within 2 months... thanks secret admirers... hehe...
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 9:55 PM
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Wednesday, November 15, 2006
wah... i totally cannot take it man... tt's beyond my extent of living... someone is pissing off my life... thanks god... i'm going to ruin her life from this moment on... get the fuck out of this world... who the fuck she thinks she is... SEAH HUI PENG...
1) changing the CCom consultation timing and date without my consent... I am certified as absent without vaild reason... you know the god damn why... i was working on wed... and that does not claim that i'm bitchy free... how much do you think you know me... not even a molecule... 1 hour after i start work at 8:30am, received the damn sms saying that consultation is on this afternoon 3pm... who do you think i am... your maid or your slave... ordered me as you fuck little girl wants to be... "I HAVE MY LIFE TO LEAD... even a ghost damn deserved a chance to live..." emailed at 12 midnight... expect me to read... that was enough... i'm not going to be so fucking stupid to believe she will deeply regret in the future... i'm gonna RUIN HER...
2) i'm not illiterate... at least i have some strength to achieving my standard my english... who is she the god damn fucker who dares to edit what i'd wrote... DO I HAVE SOME FREEDOM in writing my language... i begged for nothing... but just that page... JUST THAT ONE(1) PAGE OUT OF THIRTEEN(13) PAGES... can't i do what i want... what's make her think she is better than me... what's make her think she can writes better than me... what's makes her think she had the rights to be my shadow... using "my words" to shoot back to me... feel like giving her a tight slap... don't make me till the extent of throwing you into jail... don underestimate my power... i have not shown any YET...
that is god damn TOO MUCH... can't imagine that the only day which may enlighten me turned out to be in such state... losing the companion of my brother to support me for an entire month... i'm in deep stress to stay in this home... i had enough...
congra Zax on his courage to stand out and announced that he is going to be father soon... i was so envious about him... terribly in envious... my idol of my life indeed a person who deserved to be admired... he is the only man in this world that i considered A MAN... good luck... jia you... i'll make sure that i will fall as a blanket for you to protect you from all rotten eggs... to the extent of dreaming only... touched to my heart... good job... FIGHT!
------ cherish =(
darlin left a note at 9:42 PM
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Tuesday, November 14, 2006
such a love and tear day...
"We are in love very much..."
"I want to divorce..."
"Zax is going to be father in 10 days time..."
"Know each other for 10 years... Had been secretly admiring for 5 years..."
"25 years old Bossini shop manager found dead during his nap..."
what's the earth with this world...
3 months before 2007 Valentines' day... oh... though the day has nothing gonna do with me, but i just don noe why, that day is just so sweet...
oh... imaging my customer received a stalk of rose from the harvested rose garden of mine upon leaving from my shop... oh... under starry night, firefly rise from the piece of garden and shines the unearthed charm of rose... strolling among the piece of beauty, tt's the only dream that i have... i have no partner... it is me and myself... and the soul that is always there for me... i have no regrets...
everything seemed to be so negative around me... i don't know what had happened... is my day running near... i'm feeling more tired... when will i collapse...
anywhere, on the road of recovery... let nature take its course... just wondering when my brain can take a break...
i feel like eating sashimi dipped in wasabi with japanese soysause... oh... loLx...
ah... i had wasted 2 hours... WAT HAD I DONE?! omg...
bon voyage to my brother who will be attached to Brunei for a month... gonna miss you much... everyone who knows me will know i adores my brother the most... even when times he was selfish about his thoughts and attitude, but he is still my one and only kin that shares the same parent... i was always proud when his friends said "as brother as sister"... haha... we crap... till his friends surrendered... haha... hope that he really regards me as his sister... take care...
my ex-secondary school teacher is having a bypass operation tomorrow... god bless him... he will be fine... we have a date to celebrate as event together again... tt bbq is too merciless... take care, old man...
i believe, an encouragement a day, makes life longer...
to bel: speedy recovery, bel... one-leg kicking... goal... don't worry be happy... i believe god is on your side...
to epoh: stay on with tt pathetic "lobster" supervisor of yours... i'll be there for you... sacarstic smile is best posion to deal with such lobsters... believe me...
to teri: oh... don be sad with ur poor useless sandal... and ur 3 plasters... but i hope they last you till home...
to huifen: show's new album will be out soon... adoring an idol is good... but not too far to such extravagant extent... lower ur voice, thanks... take care...
who else viewed my blog?!
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 8:21 PM
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Monday, November 13, 2006
i have no fear on anything, until i discover i was phobia of something...
it is not a thing, but a human being... the name of that person makes me fearful... the appearance of that person makes me terrified... the voice of that person made me uncontrollably shivered... even an email from that person, i have to gather much courage to read it... that person makes me realised my death is just next to me... burying myself until the pillow, i was seeking an answer of how to seek death in a painless way...
you may not believe it that i into such state... you may be mocking at me because you felt that i deserved it... i can't do anything to make you believe... because i'm indeed a bloodstained culprit...
i'm scared out of my wits... i cried out my lungs and my heart, even almost losing my voice... i was trying all my means to forget... trying all mean to calm myself down and forget about that person... trying all mean to hide to the nether world...
perhaps, i had did too much sinst o that person that all the gods have to punish me in such way... perhaps, only death can save me from the nightmare... i was carrying a spirit with me... hugging me and cheering me when unexpected moment have to come... i'm a total failure... nothing can cure me... imaging myself at the highest floor in TP, it was pouring that day... but i do not have the courage to jump...
seeking death can cure my pain... people will shed those cocodile tears in front of me and will forget about my existence the next day... if i am to die these days, i die because of that person... i want that person to suffer till the end of her life... i want that person to suffer those pain and phobia that i had been tortured because of her... but... she is much too young to understand... i am much too childish to fight with that person...
but i am not reconcile to such fact of phobia and death that will bring to me... i have many dreams though i don't see my future... i want to work hard and create my heaven because i was determine to hide from that person after i left TP... i had enough... let all that i had owned her in my previous life to be settled in TP from the moment that i stepped out from there...
if 25,000,000 years later i will have a new life, please do not begets that cursed with me... i will prefer to be a beast and never let this nightmare happened again... i just hope to enjoy what is called a happy life... i just hope to spread my gratitude to everyone... i just wish to create those miracle to those who needed so much...
consultations, psychotherapy, stablizer, sleeping pills or what other method to cure me... let me tell you the truth... nothing is an effective medicine... the only medicine is to let yourself cure yourself internally... i have to overcome it myself... how long will it take... the gods have the control...
------ cherish =(
darlin left a note at 7:24 PM
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Saturday, November 11, 2006
haiz... haiz... haiz...
i hate school.. i hate reports... i hate projects... i hate everything that caused me to hate... i can hate friends if not they will throw shit on me... friends are god's gift...
what a nice day to swim not even getting closed to the swimming pool... first rain for the season... haiz... it's okay... as least as eileen poh does not ditch me (the day will sure come), we will have every saturady for swimming... haha... instead going swimming or you can say spa-ing in the pool, we went long john silver... lolx... service terrible...
i was so ashamed when asked "what exercise do you go for" and being answer "no"... pathetic... i can't waste my beauty "while" it is in its full bloom... i have a long "nun" life to lead... if my tomorrow still comes...
haha... parents going china, brother going brunei... yeah... hmm... just know that everything was so nice tt i do not have home alone time... oh... so sad... haiz... well... projects...........
crocodile hunter: collision course... what a show... -_-''... tribute to a death... well, not important anymore... anywhere britney spears and her hubby filed for a divorce... well... crazy...
as i promised:
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If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviour. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better.
Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle.
If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you.
If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.
You cannot change a man's behaviour. Change comes from within.
Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less. Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs.
You should not be the one doing all the bending... Compromise is a two Way street.
You need time to heal between relationships... there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.
You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals... look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.
Dating is fun... even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.
Make him miss you sometimes... when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted. - Isn't this TRUE!!!!!
Never move into his mother's house.
Never co-sign for a man.
Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.
Share this with other women...
You'll make someone smile, another rethink her choices, and another prepare.
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well, what can i say... a bias side of commenting, i agree... men are useless except making u pregnant and letting you feel heart-break - i bet no one will disagree...
good day... i hate waking up...
------ cherish
darlin left a note at 9:34 PM
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Friday, November 10, 2006
After 2 years of selfless service, a man realised that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase no commendation and that the Company is not doing any thing about it.
So he decided to walk up to his HR Manager one morning and after exchanging greetings, he told his HR Manager his observation.
The boss looked at him, laughed and asked him to sit downsaying; My friend, you have not worked here for even one day.The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.
** Manager:- How many days are there in a year?
** Man:- 365 days and some times 366
** Manager:- how many hours make up a day?
** Man:- 24 hours
** Manager:- How long do you work in a day?
** Man:- 8am to 4pm. i.e. 8 hours a day.
** Manager:- So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?
** Man:- (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours i.e. 1/3(one third)
** Manager:- That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?
** Man:- 122 (1/3x366 = 122 in days)
** Manager:- Do you come to work on weekends?
** Man:- No sir
** Manager:- How many days are there in a year that are weekends?
** Man:- 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days
** Manager:- Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how many days do you now have?
**Man:- 18 days.
**Manager:- OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining?
**Man:- 4 days
** Manager:- Do you work on New Year day?
** Man:- No sir!
** Manager:- Do you come to work on workers day?
** Man:- No sir!
** Manager:- So how many days are left?
** Man:- 2 days sir!
** Manager:-Do you come to work on National holiday?
** Man:- No sir!
** Manager:- So how many days are left?
** Man:- 1 day sir!
** Manager:- Do you work on Christmas day?
** Man:- No sir!
** Manager:- So how many days are left?
** Man:- None sir!
** Manager:- So, what are you claiming?
** Man:- I have understood, Sir. I did not realise that I was stealing Company money all these days.
**Moral*NEVER EVER*GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!!*
tt's sounded so cool rite... i just couldn't find any blunders out of it... tt's awesome... next time share with you what Oprah said about men...
well, recently found out that i have no spur in doing anything... everything done was deeming a rejection... haiz... cant wait to dig a corner and cry out loud... my life is getting too lonesome... seemed to have been wasting my time and life since the semester started... i seen where i belonged to... i seen the failure that's impending on me... i'm gratitude of the fate but perhaps... perhaps... i missed the days when i'm happy...
tomolo, see doctor in the morning to treat my cat face... den dating eileen in late afternoon (after watching japanese anime from channel u)... i wondered i shall believe her or not... will she put me aeroplane like isolating me like the others had done... there's nothing that i can blame her if misery falls upon... but i'm touched for meeting her... the bestest gift that god bestow for my first 20th years of life...
facing the utmost depression... how low can i be... how long will i last...
ooPs... today is my father's birthday... 61 years old this year... forgotten about the cake...
lastly, don't missed the line from caijing... "how long can i hold on to him (shin) for?" oh... how i wish i can enjoy pain (in my heart not my tooth) now... tt scene that shin received her after being seperated... it is so lovely... oh...
------ cherish =(
darlin left a note at 7:54 PM
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Thursday, November 09, 2006
原来我做了很多错事。。 原来我只不过是一个可怜鬼。。一个不敢面对现实又自豪的可怜鬼。。孤独，寂寞， 闷闷不乐。。就算我认错了。。就算你们原谅我。。但是我没办法让自己解脱。。我活在这个世界，实在太不值得了。。
鬼，不应该到凡间。。因为你只会带来悲剧。。明知是不应该的，绝又倔强。。何苦。。想要让别人注意到你吗。。你是谁。。你有这个资格让人类接受一个不属于这个他们世界的人吗。。
是呀。。你太特别，太了不起了。。人类实在不能没有你做他们的玩具，做他们的盆栽。。好在，你只是一个人。。轻而易举。。需要你的时候，有你可以陪旁。。有时候只要稍微合乎一下就，就没问题了。。
你这个大笨蛋。。你干吗相信人类。。你以为你只要你祈祷，将所有你遇到的人的罪降临到你身上，你就可以让他们快乐吗。。值得吗。。让你仅有的时间活在痛苦之中。。你这个大傻瓜，你只不过是个没用有白吃的工具。。何必爱上人类，何必依赖上人类。。自讨苦吃。。活该。。真不值得安慰。。
i wanna thanks kyeo... because i had found what is the root of my misery...
being too arrogant... being too foolish... being too uninteresting...
i don't need any forgiveness nor encouragement... i'm the one who derserve to do self-reflection... punish me... let me abandon myself to vice and hopefully let this useless soul dissapeared from the earth for a more deserved person to live...
even this sadism has to continue for ages, i would like to spend more time with a happy family...
i don't wish for anything... i just wish that you have the courage to tell me that 'i shouldn't live any longer in this world... your sight makes me puke... your smile disgust... your kindness sucks...' can't there be anyone who can educate me being the extra existence living in this world...
i wish to give you everything that i have, but i have nothing...
i don noe what sin had i done to her in previous life... am i too smart or is she too stupid... i'm really tired taking care of the little girl where "no harm" comes out from her mouth where that was such simple logic... my fate seemed to be controlled in her hand... my life is under threat... when can i get a nice sleep where no nightmares can cause my heart to bleed anymore... i feel so terrible... so terrible...
in fact, i do admit... these 3 years poly had been passing through so FAKE!
anywhere, a total 360 degree change from my internal feeling... while dazing at eastpoint, looking for a HUGE get well soon card for bel, i met upon these 2 guys in Precious Moment shop... ooPs... i think i got the name wrongly... anywhere, they are the Alex and Darren - the Doctor and Tutor Tan's brother... apperance + first impression: hmm... unique to hip-hop... I and Alex were engaged in some conversations... whatever... as if none of the fact i got it wrong inclue he was just trying to kill his time... anywhere... tt's all... he kinda enlightened me while trying to get through my thoughts...
------ cherish =(
darlin left a note at 10:04 PM
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Wednesday, November 08, 2006
a pathetic wednesday...
i said that i have a stragety for today's lunch right... in the end, haiz... cannot make it... i turned out to be last also... haiz... but i know what i have done wrong liao... no more next time...
well, didnt intent to eat anything today... my wisdom tooth had inched out from my top right gum and the bottom right gum is swollen... there was already a hole on my gum... haiz... it is a good time to control my diet...
when i was working diligent during the second half day, mr chay entered our QC department and suddenly called... "miss wednesday"... i was concentrating on my work... only until he had called 3 times, i finally lift up my head... -_-'''... ya lar... i only worked on wednesday... this is my nick... loLx... okay okay... secret... my salary is $8.50 per hour... hoho...
bloody hell... just now got one desperate customer service from starhub called to check whether r u interested in the cable tv... damn bastard... what the hell is wrong with starhub... customer service is so terrible... company is so desperate... i noe sales is in the drain... company shares is negative... because you know how to cajole your workers, do you think the market will still believe starhub is reliable...
not because of i can control my mood swing from my tooth pain today, i will hang up the phone immediately ah... wat stepfaine shit... i'll make sure you are the second one that i will sack you when i graduate... nothing apprasing will you hear from me of starhub till the company close down...
being too lonely for days and moody for hours, yesterday, i chatted with kenneth yeo for an hour in msn... haha... first impression surely you will think i will be "ah-lian" to him... hmm... well... count himself suay because kwoo and epoh not online, if not i won't dare to disturb him... (busy is the excuse he used on me) however, taking rubbish, i state my stand... really crappy and -_-''... haha...
he said many things had happened to him... i was totally flabergasted... but we didn't share what had happened... but it is the first time he ever told me whether he is happy or sad... we had been very cold exam mates for 5 years... we were only close during exams time... haha... either i am sitting behind him or he will be sitting behind me... tt's fate... haha...
"i may not be there when you needed a shoulder... i may not be there when you needed an encouragement... i may not be there when you needed a smile... but my heart will always be there because you are my friend..."
it was a quote by me when i wanted to give him some inspiration words... but i think i failed... my words are too difficult for humans to understand... nvm... thks neth, bro...
every week, i just can't wait for friday to come and i hate monday... haha... like primary sch kids... haha... not funny...
hope bel is fine... still considering whether to visit her tomolo... i'm so extra...
恺琳名言：
"我不恐惧爱情，我也不恐惧留下的伤痛。。
爱情的悲剧是：彼此是否能不能用真心爱对方。。”
那种真心在内心是不足够。。勇敢的表现也只是99%。。剩下的1%就要问你自己，你能一直待在她（他）身边，不管晴天雨天，你会真心爱她（他）每一天吗？
------ cherish =\
darlin left a note at 10:32 PM
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Tuesday, November 07, 2006
news headline for today... my dear friend, Christabel had slipped and fractured her left ankle when in school this late afternoon... she was heading towards the park besides the passageway of breadboard canteen... in her slippery slipper and wet floor, she slipped and fell off from the slope... news described from charlie...
those bitches and bastards who have the guts to crowd around there to watch a helpless girl in pain, please register yourself to the hell dept... your concern is significant but your apperance for appreciating the scene is totally YUCKS! luckily i was not there, if not, all my "F"s will be spilting onto all of your face...
seeing bel weeping in tears, i just don know why i can feel the pain as much as her... i was helpless at the scene... not good at consoling neither bringing any good entertainment... she shall be ready to be out from the operation room soon since 8pm... according to the doctors, i don noe what had happened... all i noe that her ankle's bone will be screwed for weeks... her bone had been subsided... haiz... poor girl... she is so fragile...
tomolo is wednesday... i'm not sure whether i am able to clear my backlogs... it hasn't been a good view since days before my contract ended previously... haiz... haiz... i supposed i had found a stragety to finish my lunch fast tomolo... haha... hope not to see eileen poh again... haha...
haiz... feel like going swimming this weekend... i had been having edema... haiz... bloated... haiz... missed eileen poh so much... haiz... hasn't been seeing her online these few days... haiz...
last but not least, Happy 20th Birthday to Adeline Chew... A blessful child with lots of loyalty friends around... she is a very fortunate girl... kinda jealous... hope you are as pretty as now, many decades down the road... stay healthy, stop smoking, be happy... best wishes and all the best...
the weather is somber, so does me...
------ cherish =(
darlin left a note at 10:17 PM
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Monday, November 06, 2006
it is the 3rd time that i'd watched the episode where Shin Goon and ChaeGeung went to the beach to play... haiz... such a sweet couple... i just don't feel sick watching that episode over and over again... haha... got one more scene is when Chae Geung hopes that Shin Goon will ask her to stay by his side... tt kissing part lor... haha... so sweet... loLx!
human is not a thing... it is not releasing or returing is a solution to solve a knot in relationship...
the weather at night was cooling since days ago... i supposed it is symptoms of moonson season... according to calender, tomolo is the day of the commence of winter... ho...
i learnt about a methodology explaination of winter in en.wikipedia... oh... amazing! share with all of you...
In Greek mythology, Hades kidnapped Persephone to be his wife. Zeus ordered Hades to return her to Demeter, the goddess of the earth and her mother. However, Hades tricked Persephone into eating the food of the dead so Zeus decreed Persephone would spend six months with Demeter and six months with Hades. During the time when her daughter is with Hades, Demeter becomes depressed and causes winter.
so, now you understand... there were some comments about symbolism of winter...
"Some use winter to suggest death"... "Some use it to suggest the absence of hope"... In a novel, winter was used as "a winter setting to mirror the bleak, frozen feelings that the characters harbor"...
so, now you understand again...
mentioning about winter, probably no one knows why i had winter firefly as my email address... well... winter was my favourite season... because it represents tranquility and coolness and sometimes happiness... whereas for firefly, i had yet to seen firefly in my life before... though i hate insects, especially flying insects, i still choose firefly because it is special... unlike other insects, firefly has a "light bulb" at its ass and it lives in some aquosite corner in some part of the world... haha... one of my countless penpal told me, 'firefly' brightens the life of others... wow... and so, the combination of winter and firefly, is a 'miracle'...
but the fact is, bo bian lar... when i changed my email address from karin1986 to winter_firefly, i have too little choices... haiz... haha... so, now you understand again too...
i likes the t-shirt tt i'm wearing today... a mixture of glitering and stencil painting... haha... bought from bossini aka bo-seng-li...
today will stop here... had not been doing homework since school starts... it is already the 3rd week of school... omg... haiz... wed is coming...
before i forget, yesterday i made this... redo 3 times due to stupid printshop got error... haiz... time used - about an hour... c a clearer pic in my friendster photo gallery... rate this 8.5/10... applause.... hula! u c... 3 of you should feel proud to be my friend... haha... loLx!
------ cherish =)
darlin left a note at 8:17 PM
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Sunday, November 05, 2006
8 more weeks before welcoming year 2007...
haiz... headaches are coming... nightmares are evolving... it is so terrible...
holding high hopes for my REDOTravel, it is almost thrashed today... i realised i'm just one of the followers... haiz... you might be curious why i am pouring myself out... perhaps no one ever know that i'm an utmost selfish person... i don like to be number two... my amour-propre don't lose to a guy... haiz......... how... everything that i do, there seldom have supporters behind me... haiz... not to say this time... i'm so tired... am i too foolish...
i might be away from singapore on 16 dec to 23 dec... going to china to visit my grand-uncle... being left behind with my mother and grandmother while the other relatives went to tour out of the village, i wanted to give them a tight slap... do they have conscience... well, it is difficult to stay with my mother... how am i going to live there... i yearn so much to travel... but there's a type of friend that i'm short of, who is travel partner... travelling soulmate, most important is the understanding of each other's taste... well, perhaps, my shadow is the best person before the ms right or mr right appeared before my coffin...
towards love life, i don't know of such matter... only thing that i can conclude will be: "when i admired him for those years, i finally found a shelter for my heart... no matter how much i had hurt myself to the doubtless shadow of him, time had only makes me feel faintness... but, before the day he rejected me, i think my mind has to take a little more longer time to be on the right track..."
perhaps, perhaps, perhaps... this is the problem that i do not has a examiner to solve... do not feel pity of me because you shouldn't be... feel happy for me because i have this shadow that makes me live until now...
"... it is never too late to repentance as long as you give yourself a chance to do so ..."i am 20 years, 1 month and 3 days old today... haha... upon here, i hope to thanks Teri, Eileen, Christabel and Kenneth Woo for being a fan of my blog... excluding those concept of
"nothing better to do" or "accidently popped into here"... i appreciated all of your kindness and forgiveness for knowing such a lengthy blogger like me... i heard a person told me that i'm a sadism... well, i'm actually not... i only believe that a sadness will let you learnt what is happiness... saying a 'thank you' or a 'sorry' may not be significance emotion in your mentalistic, but i will not forget nor regret if i say those to my dear friends... because they meant a lot to me because i... cherish each and everyone of you even that i know i will lost you the next second...
good-day!
------ cherish =)
darlin left a note at 8:48 PM
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Saturday, November 04, 2006
after watching the dvd of princess hours, i was sighed with emtionally... many thoughts, the drama really moved me in facing the "courage" towards "relationship"...
haiz... there were tears... there were silents... there were unexplainable feelings that called out to the thinking that i sealed... those memories created during the 2nd decades of life... once and only... and suddenly, i feel like falling in love with someone who i adores... that sweet exchange of love... that pain of relunctant and seperation... oh... i have gone nuts...
the most interesting part about Princess Hours is i love some of the actors' lines... it was beautifully expressed... with ups and downs events planned in the drama, smooth and though 'ridiculous'... haha... human life just don't happened what is written in drama...
i'm so jealous... perhaps i had made a wrong choice for taking my love for atonement and repayment... blah blah blah blah... what is the feeling being under the embrace of a guy... because you experienced pain, you will learn how to gain happiness...
haiz... don worry, this concept will only stay with me for a moments only... wait till the drama digested, hehe... my 'soler' power will be back... haha... but the time, i will be recharged... besides, one of the death-wound in life is 'love'... women, gamble, wine... ahiyoyo... haha...
suddenly have an urge to travel... korea perhaps will be the first stop... learning korean is essisential... and i supposed, i'm going to go there alone... most probably... none of the contestants in my list has the qualification... haiz...
now... studies and projects more important lar...
------ cherish ^_^
darlin left a note at 6:45 PM
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Friday, November 03, 2006
after today... hahahahaha... i'm not going to quarantine myself from 7 to 8pm daily in front of the tv... haha... after today, i'm gonna catch princess hours the last time on tv because i have the dvd... haha... why am i so happy about..?!
the day passed very fast for today... woke up at 8:30am... reviewed on the viva document... did much amendments on shortening the whole concept of everything... lol lor... lengthy work makes me puke! in the end, i have to rush to school before 10am... one late all late... tt tutor of my is so cruel...
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REDOTravel - a new travel agency that organized trips and tours group in bringing the uniqueness and promoting the identity of singapore...
Our main group of target is foreign travellers, especially bag-packers and retired-folks who wants a meaningful and fruitful holiday trip during the days in Singapore. sick of staying in hotel? sick of dining in air-con? sick of visiting attraction sites? sick of doing the same things as majority visitors had done? NO WAY! we are giving you an extraordinary stay in Singapore. Those package tour that you had never expected! Join us apart of "living like a Singaporean"... Bringing back souveniors in your laggage is never gonna be such much as you gonna learnt the true content in the red dot island that's gonna tell...
Nevertheless, we will never neglect folks who are just next to us. Finding a shopping spree is not a hazzle anymore... We have buses that brings you away from your district to shop around Singapore like a tourist. Your weekend is never going to be bored anymore! Not to forget, we have activities for the young dudes too! Do you want to enjoy what night-life in Singapore is? Do you want to catch the most contemporary view of Sunrise and Sunset in Singapore? Do you want to fulfil your plans of excursion in your mind?
REDOTravel is your ideal buddy!
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are you tempted?! how i wish i have a strong group of team to fulfil the dreams for others... The extraordinary way of travelling... Why do I know? Because I'm a traveller...
my presentation today was quite good... as least i cleared my mind of what i'm going to present... preparation is essential indeed! but not too much...
Ganbatte!!
There are 3 big lies in this world:
a trader who is doing losing business...
a maid who doesn't want to get married...
an elder who wants to die early...
extracted from Princess Hours
------ cherish ^_^
darlin left a note at 7:49 PM
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Thursday, November 02, 2006
it's the start of november 2006... welcome welcome...
i'm so sorry, i failed to blog yesterday... because i was too tired after a fruitful unforgettable day... i'm so sorry...
it was the first time that i have to work a whole day in eurocopter... colleagues from other department felt so surprised after seeing me in the "eatery corner" in the morning... hehe... for me, working in the morning was not new... i had worked before... so, alright... but at lunch time, luckily my colleague asked me to go lunch together, if not i won't have the guts to be so thick-skin... haha... anywhere, people seeing me "wow" during lunchtime in the company... haha... as though i'm new...
anywhere, hopped on an uncle's (ooPs! forgotten his name) mazda car with my 2 other colleagues... boss on leave today but he came to office for a while... den, went to the food court near the old loyang tau pak gong temple there for lunch... hmm... wat a lunch... i have no idea what to eat... and most importantly, i can't let people sit there and watch me eat...
shit me... i was swallowing down the food within one min because all my colleagues were done... argh... so disgracing... it's not gonne happy next time... i'll gonna have a plan... besides, it only happened once a week... haha...
but but... not to forget... while i was waiting for my food, i saw a lady in greyish pant and a t-shirt... observed carefully, it was eileen... omg... it was such a small world... i was overwhelmed to see her at the samce food center... haha... i went to strangle her... i missed her so much... haha...
after lunch, i and one of the colleague went to the recreation room in my office... a hidden room... haha... so fun... guys were slacking there watching tv... gareth was at the first sofa... kinda shocked to see me but i had expected him to be so slacking...
than, i went to a room inside the recreation room... people start coming in because their game is gonna start... it is the chinese jumping aeroplane game... haha... working in eurocopter, playing aeroplane game... haha... anywhere, they had invented a new rules for the game... a white dices is to see either you are moving forward(even) or backward(odd) and the other 3 red dices are to see what number you are going to move your aeroplane... you can choose either one of the number of the three red dices... it was so coooollll watching the guys playing... i'm not in the generation same as them... haha
sitting between my colleague and me was gabriel... in front of me who was playing is a m'sian's scholars... my the other colleague found him rude because he was looked so stern and never greet or smile to others, only when he needed help, he will kinda do favor on you... anywhere, he was a havoc... the most noisest one... omg... the others wanna ban him from entering the casino... anywhere, the last player was a colleague who i was not too close with... first time seeing each other i supposed...
anywhere, my face was buring in red when i entered the recreation room... god knows... haiz... so paisai... i was called a lobster... haha... can you imagine how reddish i was... haiz...
at 1:30pm, i was the start of the second half day of work... everything went smoothly... luckily i wasn't feeling sleepy at all, but boredom is killing... because i doesn't wan to make my day passed so meaningless, i choose working...
after working for the whole day, it was the another peak of the day... i was on the way for my secondary school bbq at mr james' house... yeah... but, feeling shouldn't do empty-handed, i and eileen went to buy dark chocolate... it was the expensive chocolate tt one lor... $14.50... i heard that dark chocolate was good for heart... but after the whole story, there's no problem in mr james's heart. but rather his aetary around his heart is blocked... he will be doing bypass operation on the next coming weeks... hopefully, my miralce is by with him...
anywhere... haha... i had rather gone nuts at tt night reason being, i was too tired... hmm... i have no intention to hurt anyone nor being abnormal... but it is the normal reaction of me when i'm tired... making myself crazy is the best method to cover my tireness... haiz... but one problem that i can't cover is being anti-social... this disease will become worse when i'm not myself... sitting at the next bench away from the crowd... chatting with eileen, i feel so apologic for the others... haiz... but the morale of the story, eileen, please don leave me alone... oh...
chatted with her a lot of things, probably not the first time that she had heard... haiz... all were truth... actually, i wanted to avoid the crowd is because, my blusher had spoiled for the day... you can see me blushed when i smiled... haiz.. why like this... haiz...
anywhere, as expected, the food couldn't finish... visit mr james's residence house, playing with his "sock"(bull dog species) and "whisky"(slvyester cat) and another greyish cat... haha... 2 cats and a dog lives happily under the same roof... only things shock of is a rat... oh, tt will be more fun...
i left mr james's house at around 11:35pm... 2 security guard came out to mention something about the cleaniness and the tap key... haha... so suai, someone actually to send me and eileen home but instead, kanna pushed for all the blames from me... haha... his expression is so cute... nice hair-style too...
btw, a friend of my is getting engage on coming weekend... same age as me... i told huifen, she was sure to say tt the gal is surely 'up the car before paying the fare'... haha... unexpected... not i don looked at it... ooPs! den, i was curious... is there something wrong with my sec sch friend?! why aren't anyone (except one) is attached... hmm... hmm... i will look forward 10 or 20 years down the life, everyone bringing their wife and children for gathering... haha...
so, i reached home at 12:30am... such a lonely and 'fuel-emptied' day... woke up at the wrong timing for school... came home after tt and i was so dready and took a short nap before princess hour broadcast... haha...
i'm quite nervous for tomolo because i'm going to present my viva... haiz... i did a reflection about myself when i received the work completed by my friend... actually, i admired tt little girl... she is so talented in language... haiz... there's something that someone is always better than you...
it is such a very long blog for the day... haha... enjoy
------ cherish ^_^
darlin left a note at 10:53 PM
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